What is toxic positivity, and how to cultivate healthy positivity instead

Toxic positivity sounds like an oxymoron. Humans do better when we experience roughly 3 positive emotions for every 1 negative. So how could toxic positivity exist?

Healthy positivity doesn't mean feeling NO negative emotion. As I’ve written about before, it's critically important that we allow ourselves to feel ALL our emotions. Nor does it mean trying to experience 99 positive emotions for every one negative – a phenomenon now often labelled “toxic positivity”. It is a strong contrast with authentic, healthy positivity, which is unforced, non-performative and leaves room for the inevitable down times.

It's interesting to consider which emotions we cultivate. Most of us experience plenty of negative emotions without needing actively to seek them out. Yet we often do cultivate them. Where do you do this? For me, getting off Twitter was a great way to stop unnecessarily cultivating negativity.

Whereas doing things we love, with people we love, is a great way to allow authentic positivity to arise naturally.

Time in nature, connecting with friends and family, laughing together at a silly movie …. rather than trying to be positive, find ways to spend your time and energy to allow healthy positivity to arise naturally.

Trying to eliminate negativity and dogmatically pursue positivity can quickly become toxic. Rather, for most of us this might involve more of a subtle shift in emphasis and awareness that will bring significant benefits over time.

To find out more, get in touch.

Take care of yourself and others,

Madeleine

I work with clients from executive leadership teams to the front line, helping them to make clearer decisions about what they want, and adapt faster and more easily to change and transition. I use deep purpose as a key to unlock powerful thriving in work and life.

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