If working harder worked, your to-do list would be done.

If working harder worked, your to-do list would be done.

Sometimes we need to work unbelievably hard. Sometimes, we need to work so hard that we become exhausted and unwell, needing time to recover.

The key phrase is “need to”.

How is it that so many of us have taken on a belief that getting a project done for our corporate employer, or getting a report up to HQ on time, or attending a Saturday conference call to progress some financial transaction, is a “need” for which our physical and mental health is worth sacrificing? It’s bonkers. That is not need. We need to stop.

When I was working as a junior lawyer, I vividly remember one of my colleagues staying back late into the evening to turn a document (ie, process comments on a contract that had come out of a negotiation and get them into a fresh draft to send to the “other side” before the morning which is a sentence I even grew bored typing). He missed his first wedding anniversary dinner to do that. There was no particular deadline, just an internalised idea that the need to get the document turned that night was more critical than anything else.

I don’t know if he had a second wedding anniversary.

Sure, work hard when you need to. I do. But a healthy relationship respects needs on both sides.

Being connected with your family and friends, having downtime, eating well, exercising and sleeping. These are not privileges or rewards. You don’t need to justify them or ask for permission.

Until next week,

Take care of yourself and others

Madeleine

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