Nothing changes in Should Town

Acceptance has a bad rap. It sounds passive. It sounds like giving up. In fact, it can be quite the opposite.

You can spend your energy fighting reality forever. Or you can accept reality and get on with things.

Acceptance can sound like the easy way out. In fact, it takes courage to accept undesirable facts.

  • Your trusted 2IC has been badmouthing you to competitors

  • Not enough people want to buy what you’re selling

  • You’re unhappy in your job

  • Your health is suffering because you haven’t been eating, sleeping or moving well enough

When you’re living in Should Town (he should be more loyal, they should want this, she should be a better leader, I should be able to do whatever I want), you can’t deal with what is.

Feeling angry and hard done by, while it may sometimes be perfectly justified, is a short-term tonic. You don’t have to like reality, but nothing changes in Should Town.

Spending energy wishing reality were otherwise can be a seductive trap, but if you really want things to be different, you first need to accept where you are. Then you can make a realistic plan for change.

Until next week,

Take care of yourself and others

Madeleine

PS This recent article in the Harvard Business Review expands nicely on this idea.

PPS If you’d like to work with me as you work through the reality of your situation and set about changing it, let me know. Send me a message to enquire, and please share with anyone you think may benefit.

I help accomplished professionals untangle difficult career questions so they can thrive in work and life.

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Madeleine Shaw